What?! What are you even trying to say? What happened to you?!Ayan: They were very sexually charged, it is what I felt!Mona: What?! Who are you talkin... about? Why the lack of clarity! And why are you taking so much time to type? Just tell me what happened! You don’t have to think twice before telling me things, Ayan!Ayan: I know, Mom. I am sorry, I just got distracted.Mona: You are sexting your mother, and you still get distracted?!Ayan: I was just playing the visuals in my mind.Mona: Ayan. Is. And gosh, as I listened to the song wind itself out of existence, and then pop back into the groove, I could only think they succeeded. It took me twenty minutes to notice that Gary really did have the song on auto-repeat, which is ironic as the song already repeats itself in twisted, unpredictable ways. We listened to the BE YOURSELF mantra several times as we lay there. Finally, Gary snagged the remote off the bedside table and we were plunged into a rather short-lived silence."Where would. And who the heck is this picture of on the metal?The Sheriff looked to the men scattered around the room and asked, “That about what went on here boys?”There were a lot of heads nodding yes and several verbal yesses. He looked at the two he was still covering with his pistol and said, “How about you two. That the way it went?”Doug said, “Yeah, pretty much.”“OK. Hiram, ya said these two just stood there and didn’t cause no trouble?”“Yep. Nary a bit, just took off out of here when I told them to. . and I must say I'm smoking hot. I'm also still pretty damned horny."Which do you think is worse?" I ask Dan, posing in front of him. "Going to class with gigantic angel wings... or with bewbs?" Boobs seem less likely to attract media attention..." says Dan. I turn sideways and push them up. They're a little bit smaller than when I'm fully demonized... but much more round, taut, and 'athletic'. At least I won't have to worry about a bra, or having two sweater cows beating me to death when I go.
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