We recognize, first and foremost, that we’re not in a relationship to focus on how well the other person is learning their lessons, but rather to fo...us on learning our own.The ego defends against love, not fear. Pain in relationships can be perversely comfortable pain, in that is one we know. We’re used to it. I once heard a tape by Ram Dass, an American spiritual teacher, in which he told of seeing a newspaper article about an abused baby being taken away from his mother. As a police matron. But it felt to me that it was going on for a few hours. While being smothered in the face with Ann’s left breast, while she tried to move about and wrestle all to get the remote from me, all I could think about was how big her breasts could be? How firm could it be? Can I tell for sure whether she was wearing a bra?I hadn’t seen a real breast at that time. And I couldn’t tell the absolute size. But it was relative measurement all that matters. So all I could think of was if I cupped it would it. The fact she had a boyfriend bothered neither of us. My flat mate smiled at her politely as she sat down. He was already sorted with his friends wife due to visit later that evening. His eyes fixed on Sigi's trimmed snatch, on view to all as her short skirt rode up as she sat down. A girl out for a drink wearing no panties was a banker he thought. My friend had nothing pre arranged. He would do as he always did. He would seek out the prettiest girl in the bar, insult her for the best part of. I put on a bra and a cream body, dental floss. I put on a short skirt, schoolgirl or Scottish type. I put on a short vest, sleeveless, black and made of leather. I combed my long, straight black hair, made up with delicate shades and red lips, I colored earrings and jewels, I put on silver studs. I looked in the mirror and I don't remember what I thought, but surely I said something like: shit you look good. I left the house, I went to the garage, I opened the door, I went outside. I had not.
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